It can be extremely difficult for the entire family to raise a child
with ADHD. But learning specific parenting skills in relation to ADHD
is extremely important for the health of the child as well as the
relationship between child and parent. One thing that would be really
useful for parents is to join a support group that is both educational
and socially supportive. Here is where parents will learn how to
deal with their special children and become effective parents.
One very important thing a parent needs to do is set clear goals for
themselves and their children. After these goals are set, it is crucial
to be as consistent as possible. Many times, if the child is old
enough, you should include them in the goal setting process and allow
them to help set the rules. This will tend to force the child to follow
the rules better.
Keep in mind that a parent's relationship with their child is essential
in any family, but it is doubly important with ADHD children. For
a relationship to work, you need both time and a willingness to listen.
Spend at least fifteen minutes to half an hour a day with your
child. Ask him or her about their day. Have a conversation
or eat dinner with them. Simple things like this are the most important
in keeping good connections with your child. By keeping these good
connections with your child, you will be better able to see when to
intervene if a problem should arise.
Even though it may seem like an ADHD child has more bad behaviors than
good, emphasize the good ones as much as possible. The more you
emphasize the good behaviors your child does, the better their
self-concept will be. It is so easy for a parent to cause a bad self
esteem in their ADHD child, so this should be foremost on your mind in
order to avoid this potential hazard.
When your child has misbehaved, try to stay as calm as you possibly
can. The more out of control you act, the less seriously discipline is
taken. Make sure when rules are broken that there are very clear
consequences and that they are delivered in an unemotional manner.
Yelling at a child with ADHD is extremely destructive.
Give your child choices for what they can do. Do not tell them exactly
what they will eat, wear and do. The more choices they have, the
more independent they will become as time goes on.
Make sure that the relationship behaviors modeled between parents are
good ones. Children watch what you do, and they will imitate what they
see later on in life. Make sure your behaviors are positive ones.
It is important that parents have time for themselves, or it is only
natural that you will become stressed out. This is especially true for
mothers who always feel they need to give 100% of themselves at all
times. Even as a mother, you are an individual and need to take care of
yourself as well.
Remember to be strict but kind. It is good to be firm, but being overly
firm is not good either. Make sure your children know the difference.
It is not good to be overly passive either.
Keith Londrie II is a well known author. For more information on ADHD, please visit living-with-adhd.us/ ADHD for a wealth of information. You may also want to visit keith's own web site at keithlondrie.com/keithlondrie.com/